A marginal INTP, Sonmi 451, and the return of old habits

Caveat, forgive the incoherence. I just woke up from an extended afternoon siesta and I have so many disjointed thoughts that must not be left unrecorded. Here goes:

1. Thursday I met with the G2 (our college apartment number) people for a ‘quick drink’ and discussions flew from the wedding of V’s brother to our collective reservation on some extroverted types. I am a marginal INTP. Some days I really feel socially inept, but too bad my job requires me to talk and show proof of human contact. The ordeal begins anew tomorrow.

2. Reconciliation: “You have marginal or no preference of Thinking over Feeling (1%).” I am often torn between what’s practical and what’s kind. Why must it always be a bloody fucking skirmish.

3. Think I sunk too deep into the narrative of Cloud Atlas. I am shaken by the frailty of a Fabricant’s life, in love with Luisa Rey, extremely happy for Timothy Cavendish, jealous of and afraid for Frobisher, and so excited to finish the book to see how helping an Indian stowaway would work to Mr. Ewing’s benefit. Next in line is The Lonely Londoners by Sam Selvon.

4. The past week was marked by a sudden return of old habits: drinking 4 of 7 days, smoking a whole pack each day, being peevish about boredom. I will try to be more productive this coming week.

5. J loaned me her classical guitar. I tried playing this morning and was pleasantly surprised–still remember a few chords but my hands are no longer used to the stress. Haha!

6. I am thankful that somehow there’s something to look forward to next week. It’s race day on Sunday and high time to crash train.

Cheers!

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